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2 Ways Individualism and Exceptionalism Kills the Black Revolution: Should Black Men Date out?

By Sicebise Msengana

I don’t know whether we African men should date or sleep with white women or not ( i.e. Non-African females) to prove that we don’t hate non-African people, in particular, white people.

Every time we talk about building for ourselves, everyone else seems to have a problem. Yet, they can exclude us with no problem. When we African men say that it is impossible to build strong African
communities, businesses and families without African  (Black) women; someone comes along and convinces that we should stop "limiting ourselves" to one group of women and that we are "racist" if we don't want to date or marry white females and we are "missing out."

As an African man, a Xhosa man to be specific. I find it hard to comprehend the idea of how on earth would a group of people can STEAL our land, ENSLAVE, OPPRESS us, KILL us, RAPE our women for over 500 years and “love” us the next minute without a massive cultural, economic, political, social and psychological change on their part.

Something is not right.

But I’ve noticed that some white women say things like “Black men don’t belong to Black women!” which is wrong.  I can’t speak for all African men. So I will speak for myself and other  “conscious” brothers who see what’s going on: being politicised to support white domination.

Let’s briefly discuss two ways the Black revolution is killed:

Another brother writes “I'm not a "black man" who "dates white women." I'm a person. I have my own unique experiences and some of them include having dated women who are white, but because interracial dating is such a historically tense and loaded subject, it's hardly ever looked at with any understanding or compassion for the people personally involved.”

I try to keep an open mind on interracial sex/marriage, yet, one can’t help but recognise that it is impossible for Africans, everywhere in the world to do anything for themselves as long as they’re subjugated and integrated into the dominant system—in this case, white supremacy. This is a fact. There are tons of research to support it.

Unless Africans are magicians and they can turn anything to work in their favour, but no powerful people in human history have built a strong powerful empire between the legs of their enemies and oppressors.

False individualism is killing the African community, especially the African American males who think that they’re separate from the Black community.

Individualism makes just as little sense for the oppressed Black majority as it does for white people. To stray away from the “herd” and be a “individual” or “a human being!” in a white supremacy society, is one of the dumbest things any person of African descent could ever dare to practice. No one including white people is an individual to a certain extent.
Every child is born in a community and raised by that community, with the  hope that one day they can make meaningful contributions to that particular community. For example, a white child is born of white parents and it takes both its parents and the white community to groom that child into an adult.

Its upbringing, values, beliefs systems and outlook on life is greatly influenced by Western culture (e.g. European culture).
Back to the African community, no African person is an island no matter how much they can try to lie and cover it by saying “I'm an individual. I have a right to be happy all the time" "My happiness comes first" "I'm a human being."

Nevertheless, no one willing to hold these brothers accountable for their actions.  That's not MANHOOD, but boyhood! You are not a man when you are not accountable for your actions.

I don't live as an individual but as a part of the Black community. In essence, we African men don’t see ourselves as individuals. We don’t see ourselves separate from the daily struggle to liberate our women and the African community globally.

A real man steps to the plate. His family and  community comes first over his lust (non-African women/ interracial sex) and even himself. Manhood is about self-sacrifice. A real man appreciates, loves, respects, and truly values a woman. We love those who belong to us (African women).


Michelle Alexander, author of The New Jim Crow, “This is where black exceptionalism comes in. Highly visible examples of black success are critical to the maintenance of a racial caste system in the era of colorblindness. Black success stories lend credence to the notion that anyone, no matter how poor or how black you may be, can make it to the top, if only you try hard enough. These stories ‘prove’ that race is no longer relevant...”

In a white supremacy society, what is about a person who abandons the struggle to empower the women of his enemies or open her legs to the products of a system that depends on the DEATH and DESTRUCTION  of Africans and the ongoing  DEATH and DESTRUCTION of African people worldwide?

Even if we can take miscegenation seriously on its premises, and made an argument for it by let’s say, interracial sex and marriage will end racism and what about the historical evidence that has proved contrary to this myth? Chancellor Williams mentioned “brotherhood" and "integration" were most beneficial for the whites even when they were in a politically subordinate status.” Are we going to bury our heads into the sand and act like it never happened or that history won’t repeat (when history is replaying itself before our own eyes) it?

Some African folks think because they’re sleeping with white people or marrying these non-African people, it’s a cause for celebration. Just because you have found your white knight or a snow bunny doesn’t mean that you’re special, in my opinion.

It simply means that you’re a quitter and a failure. Giving up on Black love and not being persistent has been part of the Black psyche ever since the domination of that Asia and Europe was imposed on Africa. Dr. Chancellor Williams writes “There were dire consequences in terms of their psychological impacton Africans under perpetual danger. A new fatalism emerged that carried the sentence of ultimate doom to the minds of thousands. Some gave up resistance to anything, including a resistance to slavery andresistance to the barbarism that engulfed those who either went back-wards or stood still for mental atrophy; some tried to save themselves byserving the invaders' cause, even if it meant enslaving and killing their own people; some believed that because the white man came in big ships with big, earth-shaking guns (cannons), surely they must be the gods of the world; others saw no sense in trying to maintain unity in the face of such overwhelming odds”—pg. 222. What is special about this? In other words, what is special about being a quitter than never giving up and fighting for unity and self-determination in the midst of adversity?

I don’t see anything revolutionary about a group of African individuals that pretend to live in some fantasy Utopian make-believe world where they see nothing wrong with the system which oppresses not only them, but their people as well on the basis of skin colour. According to Chancellor Williams “The  coming  of  the  Caucasian  whether  from  Asia  or  Europe,  whether  in  the  name  of peace,  trade…no  matter  what  pretext  they  came  in  it  meant  the  destruction  of  the  highly advanced  civilization  of  the  Blacks  and  their  total  degradation  as  a  people.” What is exceptional about these people who ignore these facts and jump into bed with their European and Asian to support White and Asian domination?

Again, a valid point is made by Dr. Williams “... . The wide use of "black" agerts, usually Mulattoes, continued to be the white man's secret weapon is becoming masters of the black world. When the Blacks were on top they could pose as loyal members of theblack race-as many of them were in fact; or they could, having "whiteblood," ally themselves with the whites and serve their interests. The whites always made this both easy and attractive not only by emphasising their superiority by blood, but by giving them better education and economic opportunities than Blacks under constant survival pressures could ever hope to achieve. This system became worldwide in dividing the race and creating hostile color bars within it” –pg. 218.  What is special about using your bodies to collaborate with white supremacy and assist in the oppression of your own people through these confused babies with mixed loyalties?

In conclusion, no one is against people “falling in love,” after all, we are constantly told that “human” beings can’t “help who they love;” dating and marrying outside your ethnic group is a huge political statement and love is not a uncontrollable seizure. You choose who you love.

Interracial sex/marriage happens within a political- social context to achieve political and social ends. No group of people can go from hating another group of people for over 500 years and integrate that group, the next moment.

White people are only interested in African people when they’re of use to them. Usually things like miscegenation are done by white people to benefit themselves. People genuinely interested in racial justice are well aware that sex, kisses, marches and having children with Europeans and Asian will not eliminate the race problem, instead, these token gestures will increase it. Let’s fight for REAL justice, freedom and equality instead and everything else will fall into place.


1. Dr. Chancellor Williams, The Destruction of Black Civilisation. Pg. 79, 80-100, 111, 218, 222.

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